so so long...

wow----it's been a long time since i've posted. you might think i was too busy, something was horribly wrong, whatever, but no...the truth is, just unmotivated, busy-yes, but mainly just too lazy to get it done!! so this is finals week at school. i took 1 monday, 1 today, and i have just 1 more tomorrow and then it's so long to this school year and hello summer!! I'M SO READY!!! i have a very busy weekend coming up though unfortunately i won't be spending the time with my two boys!! i have our nursing school graduation ceremony on friday evening, work saturday, jess is having a party sat night, and then sunday is mother's day so we're going to brunch and that day is my sleeping day!! chris and caden are going to be spending the weekend in colorado at cousin ron's wedding. i wish i could go, but i can't miss the nursing ceremony and the normal saturday girl at work, her boyfriend is graduating so she needed me to work for her. i figured i couldn't really say no when in 20 days from now, i'll be on a plane to greece!!! the countdown is on as is the countdown for getting our passports in....that's getting a bit scary!!
chris and i have also been doing some house shopping. nothing serious really. we've always planned on moving after i graduate next may but decided to get a head start and see what happens. we're not seriously looking really. just trying to see what's out there in our price range, the kinds of layouts available, etc. if something just perfect comes up and we get our house sold then we'll go for it, but that's a big big IF and we're not putting our house on the market yet or anything. we haven't even let our agent come and see our place yet!! we have looked at 4 homes and have another 1 to look at tonight. none of them were just what we are looking for. very nice, but not THE house. we're going to be very picky and very patient. and it's very fun to go and see these homes!!
i also received a very excited email from my friend, rachel wood, who i grew up with and was my maid of honor in chris and i's wedding. she is ENGAGED!! she has been very patient and i'm so happy that she was and has found the man she wants to spend her life with!! they have set a wedding date for april 5, 2008!! so that's about what has been going on in my world!! thanks for checking in!!

busy busy

it has been one busy week around this place. a good one though. i weighed in this morning and have lost another 2.5 lbs so we're just keeping on keeping on!! that's encouraging as always. and i had to get gas today and paid a ridiculous $41.00 to fill up my jeep liberty. RIDICULOUS!! it just angers me every time. i don't know exactly what needs to change but something as far as gas prices goes has got to be done!! i haven't seen much of my boys this week unfortunately...got home late from topeka clinicals on wednesday and then last night i had to work the annual "working women's night out" event. it's a deal where lots of businesses have booths and give away lots of free prizes and samples to working women. the favorite thing...the free beer!! saw a lot of people that i haven't seen in a while so that was nice actually, and i got to get paid, while drinking free beer!! i didn't want to fight parking so i had my friend tammi take me to the auditorium after class and jess had agreed to pick me up so she did and we went and had another drink! i hadn't seen that girl this week so it was nice to spend just that little bit of time with her! we have a big shopping trip coming up tomorrow though! her dad and step-mom cricket are in town so jess, heather, cricket, and i are going to go shopping for greece clothes!! should be a great girl-time day!! i'm looking forward to it! i'm working today from 3-6 so i will have the evening to spend time with chris and caden and i'm excited about that as well!! oh yea....i almost forgot this...getting caden dressed this morning and i found this little tick on my baby's shoulder!! yuck!! i really don't like those things and it was stuck pretty good but caden was a very big boy about letting me get him off of there!! i didn't see anymore, but when chris comes home from fishing or whatever, and finds a tick, i make him go and do a whole body search because they just freak me out!!! so, i didn't find anymore on caden but i'll be checking him over and over now for days i'm sure since i'm just a freak like that!!! anyway--have a good day!

Easter Sunday

what a great day we had today. nice to see our family from out of town and what a beautiful day for an easter egg hunt! caden loved that the easter bunny brought him candy and little toys for today and he's becoming such a pro at finding hidden treasures! mommy loves dressing him up like such a cool little man!! as my friend jamie says "he's such a little pimp"! not sure how much i like that saying!! we had a great day playing and visiting with our family that we only see about once a year, although we're sad to have missed great-grandma irene's surprise birthday party in sedan! we were thinking about you though great-grandma and happy 80th birthday tomorrow!!! we love you! we forgot to have someone take our family picture so we took a couple of caden with mommy and with daddy just before nap time. i love this kid so much!! even though we had a great time doing easter bunny things, today is about jesus dying on the cross to save us from our sins, and i am forever grateful for this sacrifice. without it, my life would not be as it is and certainly i would not know all the blessings i receive every single day. i am thankful.

Fishing Trip

we went on a family fishing trip last evening with the nice weather. we almost caught a fish on caden's pole with the first cast! he shortly lost interest though and he and i spent most of the time on the playground while daddy fished. it was a lovely evening!! Too bad the warm weather isn't hanging around for very long. Can't wait for another trip!

Another Day

The weekend is coming to a close, and already i am dreading returning to school, especially since it's going to be 82 degrees and partly sunny here tomorrow!! i love spring but hate to be indoors when it's nice. today is a beautiful day also....in fact, it would have been a great day for a birthday party at the park!!! oh well....we've spent some time playing with our new toys today and as soon as caden wakes up from his nap, we're going to meet daddy to go fishing at uncle randy's with his new fishing pole. i'm supposed to be studying but i have been playing with my newest pictures toy. it's a program that lets you make photo video's and put them to music. it's great and i love playing with it! bog says it makes her cry though! it does me too, but it's the coolest thing. so i have spent part of this afternoon downloading more appropriate music than i choose for my mp3 player...for some reason, chris doesn't think that shakira's "hips don't lie" song is a good choice for sweet little boy pictures! not real sure what the problem is but i found some great "family" songs so i'll be covered for a while! it's been a great weekend and i'm sad to see it end!! we also went over and met jess's new little guy, "huck". he's a cutie and fits right on caden's lap! he would kiss caden and caden would say "he likes me". then caden decided that it was time for huck to go night-night in his cage and stuffed all this toys in there too...we could hardly find the little huck man!! not so sure he still likes caden!! just kidding....they were awful cute together and i'm certain that crazy lena lou will adjust and start mothering him in her crazy lena kind of way!! look out huck...she's a lot bigger than you!! they'll grow to be good friends (as long as huck grows fast!!!) gonna have a busy week coming up with easter just around the corner. so, that's it for the weekend i think. take care!

Birthday Party Day

It was a windy, cloudy, and downright cold at times day in the park, but we had a good time and enjoyed ourselves and Caden's party anyway. He got lots of great presents (thanks to you all), and spent the last hour or so running and playing with his cousins, grandpa tom, uncle randy "the great", and daddy. Over all, it was a success, though I think next year, we'll plan for an indoor party just in case!! "Bog and Papa", my mother and father-in-law, spent the evening and night with us last night, so they got some special one-on-one time with their only grandson. I think they had a great time. We love it when they visit so we want to make sure it's fun so they keep on coming back!! When in Greece....IN LESS THAN 2 MONTHS.....i think caden is going to spend some time at their house in sedan. it'll be fun times for them, but lonely nights for daddy!!! we'll see how long he lasts (daddy that is)!! Well, we've had a day full of festivities and fun so it's time to hit the sack jack......oh yea, and those of you who are loyal http://HunnasHappenings readers, be sure to stay tuned to hear about the new little man in Jess's life!!! I can't wait to meet him tomorrow!! Till then...goodnight

Caden's Special Day

in 77 minutes, it will be exactly 3 years since our little miracle boy made his way into this world. 9:16pm was the magic moment. i really can't believe that it's already been 3 years since this sweet boy met us face to face for the very first time!! it just goes so fast!! i am trying to cherish every moment but they seem to be slipping away so quickly!! we have had a great day!! a cute story...last night, chris and i were telling caden that today was his birthday and he was going to be 3 years old. he kept saying "no mommy, me 2" so we of course said that he was right and that he was 2 but when he woke up in the morning, it would be his birthday and he would be 3. so we went to bed and this morning when he woke up, i asked him if he knew what today was? he said "yes mommy, it's my birthday!" and i said "yes and how old are you today?" and he said "3 mommy" and held up his 3 little fingers!! such a smarty pants!! we have had a nice night. picked him up after class at 4 and daddy and gigi had put together his swing set so i made sure that he didn't go to the back yard. when daddy got home, we gave him one of those little plastic bowling balls and pins games....we've been to a couple of bowling parties so we thought we'd practice!! he loved it and we played for quite a while. then, grammy/nemo and gigi called and asked if caden could come out and play so we let him go outside and see his swing set!! they tied a big bundle of balloons to it too! and caden was so excited that he took off running as fast as he could, right past nemo and gigi and the swing set all the way to the fence and back!! it was so funny!! then he immediately started going round and round up and down the slide!! he tried both swings, the trapeze thing, and the teeter totter. he's going to have such a fun time playing on it this spring and summer. thankfully, the weather cooperated enough to have the sun shining and be dry from about 3-6 so it was perfect timing! then we ate pizza (one of caden's favorites), had STRAWBERRY "scoobie-doobie" cake per caden's request, and opened the rest of his presents. i ordered him this huge inflatable soccer ball with a little help from one of jess's catalogs. it cost me about $5 i think and i really think it might be his favorite toy!! it is fun. he also got a musical thomas the train, some ku clothes, a couple other shirts, and 2 pairs of swimming trunks (thomas is 1 of them of course!) and this hot wheels race car track that you try and crash the cars as they go through the loop! pretty neat and we've had fun playing that. chris also got him a baseball bat/ball that is soft enough to be used indoors. grandpa tom brought over his present....a box full of rolled "spare change" that he had been saving. it's for the "hot rod fund" and the box is so heavy i can't lift it!! it's quite a large sum of money!! so, caden officially has more money in his saving account (or he will following this deposit) than chris or i either one!! all in all, a very good day...i'm going to go and spend some more time with my sweet boy now!! SO HAPPY BIRTHDAY CADEN MONTGOMERY WILSON!!

Updates

Yet again, here i am playing catch up!! it was a very busy weekend! i worked at Diamonds by Design on friday and saturday. then yesterday, caden and i, mom & dad, and courtney & kaylee, all left early sunday morning for kansas city, to attend courtney's best childhood friend's baby shower. we grew up with sasha and her mom julie just down the street and at chris and i's wedding, sasha told my dad that she always pretended that he was her dad so he felt it was important that he see her during her pregnancy. she is due april 25--which happens to be my niece, kaylee's birthday! funny how things work out that way. things were fine with courtney and i and the kids who were in my jeep--but sure got hairy whenever we were with my parents!! i don't know what that's about really, but my blood pressure sure shot up while shopping at target and at lunch! CRAZY is all i have to say about that i think. got home around 8pm i think and was sure tuckered out!!
today was a GREAT day other than having to go back to school! I'M SO READY FOR SUMMER!! having said that, some great things happened at school so it wasn't all bad!! i was taking an advanced dysrhythmias class from 4-6, making my monday's at school be 1-6pm. well, it is an elective course that just started before spring break, so i decided that i was no longer interested in taking this class! me and about 5 others i think! so i dropped it! that makes my day again 1-4. then i signed up to enroll for next semester and asked my advisor if she thought it would be possible to get out taking the very dreaded research class. she told me to go and talk to dr. calhoun-the chair of the dept--and professor for that class so very nervously, i approached her. SHE AGREED that my undergraduate and graduate research class would suffice and to have dr. wendling substitute my undergraduate research class for this one!!! I AM SO HAPPY!! that is a huge weight lifted off my shoulders!! it is a class that take a tremendous amount of time outside of class and requires a big research project and presentation--all of which i despise!! so yea for me!!!
i had also been waiting on a check in the mail for some time now and finally received it today so now i have some money!!! so much less stress!! so, that's my day!!
tomorrow i am enrolling in the morning and then going to topeka to interview at the diamonds by design store there so that i will be able to work some hours there especially this summer and get more hours in. i'd actually be quite content only working at the one here---and i do love it!! seriously...they are paying me to shop for jewelry, help others pick out beautiful jewels, and play with loose stones to come up with new designs!! a little bit of heaven!! so tomorrow i'm doing that and then spending the night with my cousin shelby so i'll already be in topeka for my clinical wednesday!! then thursday is caden's big boy 3 year old birthday!!! i can hardly believe it!!! so, i'm signing off for a couple of days.....it's entirely possible that i may go into withdrawl from not having a computer near me, but i'll try and work something out!!

Caden's 3 year check-up!

this boy is so good!! i really mean it!! he did exactly what the dr tells him and cooperates fully!! no crying, no fighting, nothing. just cool, calm, and collected!! even when he made him gag, i thought for sure he'd cry then but nope!! the dr said that usually by the end of the exam, the 3 year olds are in tears, but by 4 they are usually more cooperative so he thought caden did great. of course, since mommy practices things on him all the time, that helps!! such a good boy!! the dr said he is doing great all around. i feel like he should weigh a little more...29lbs and 36inches, but the dr said that this was just fine and not to worry about it a bit. i asked about him not really eating much, and he said that they don't usually at his age and unless he is way skinny, he's fine. and as we all know, a kid a little on the thin side is better than the other way. guess he really is taking after his daddy in that department!! and that's good. i had to get a hepatitis-a shot for my upcoming trip to greece, so i had caden come around so he could see, you know to be a good model for shot-taking, and i thought he was going to cry!! his little eyes turned red on the edges but i told him it was ok and mommy was fine and then he was ok!! such a sweet kid!! so of course i said i'd take him to lunch...where you might ask....mc donald's of course. isn't that every kids favorite? and i had voiced concerns about his eating, so what does he do, but eat all of his chicken nuggets!! we wanted to play on the toys but they were locked because it rained last night and i thought we might have a melt down over it, but he composed himself, and said "we can come play tomorrow, not today, but tomorrow". and, since it's proud mom day, he also counted cats in a book and counted to 8 all by himself!! he can get to 10 if he wants to and occassionally with a little help, 15!! so smart this kid is!! simply amazing!

My Mom

i have mentioned in previous posts, that my mom has some significant health issues occurring right now. osteoporosis is only one of them, and a serious situation. she told me on monday, that she thought she may have cracked or broken a rib when she bumped into the corner of the counter top at home the other day. there is a sharp corner there and she had some bruising and a whole lot of tenderness. she saw the endocrinologist at ku med monday and he told her that they could x-ray it and it probably would show a broken rib, but since there isn't anything they can really do for it, it seemed like a waste of money. so she went on and then tuesday, things got worse, so she went to see the nurse practitioner at her primary care dr's office since he was out. they did an x-ray and said that one of her ribs is broken right in half. easy to see, and definately painful, but since the dr was gone, not official. they called today....she actually has 3 broken ribs, not just 1. they are trying to get her started on an injection form of medication that is very expensive and insurance fights covering, but she can't take the oral medications because she has severe esophagitis and if the medication got stuck in her throat as so many do, it could cause pretty serious damage. so until they can get it approved she just has to wait. they did decide to go ahead and start her on 50,000 iu of calcium but no one in emporia carries this amount so they had to order it in before she could start it. she's so scared to even move for fear of breaking other bones. what a mess!

GOT A JOB!!

it's true!! i have a job!! i kept forgetting to post about the outcome of my interview with the boys and girls club. i was not offerred that job and from what i have heard since then, it's a good thing for me! so i went yesterday and put my application in at a jewelry store called "diamonds by design". i had seen an ad for a part time person several weeks ago, but that was the same time as the boys and girls club so i put it off. then it was advertised again this weekend so i went there and put my application in yesterday morning. they called me yesterday at lunch time and set up an interview for today and basically hired me on the spot! the down sides are that the pay isn't nearly what it was for the boys and girls club, and they are open on saturday's which takes away from my time with chris and caden, but truthfully, not many part-time jobs that can be as flexible as i need them to be, aren't open on saturdays. so, we'll have to plan things a little better as far as trips and weekend fun. so that part stinks. but the up sides are many in my book!! first--i love jewelry so messing with diamonds and other jewels all day sounds like a great deal of fun!! they also make their own jewelry so a lot of what they do for their clients involves designing a piece based on their desires, lifestyle, and personality so it's not like other jewelry stores where you pounce on the person when they come in the store, which is good, because that kind of thing i wouldn't be good at. they are willing to be very flexible with my school schedule and i'll be able to get in more hours this summer by working some in the topeka store also. a couple days a week at that would be ok. i interview at the topeka store on tuesday. and the biggest thing.....IT'S A PAYCHECK!! and that i desperately need. so, all in all, i'm happy. i wish chris were more excited, but he really doesn't like the thought of me working saturdays at all. i think part of that is because he's afraid it will cut in on his fishing time!! in the summer, he usually fishes 1 day and spends the other with us, so if he can't go on sat, he'll want to go on sunday and then we wouldn't see each other at all!! but she tells me that they are looking to change the saturday hours to only 10-2 and that wouldn't be so bad. and i know he thinks i'll want to spend all my money there, and i'm sure i will want to, but i won't. i don't know what kind of discount employees receive yet, but i'm not looking to get anything new anytime soon. maybe for graduation??!! but that's a year from now so until then, it's just a paycheck! i actually work friday and saturday already!! jess is going to keep caden because chris has to work this saturday also so it'll work out! wish me luck!

Upcoming Birthday

so hard to believe that in just 9 days (march 29), my miracle baby boy will be 3 years old. it seems like just yesterday that we called everyone to say that he was coming on that monday and everyone waited all day and night in the waiting room at the hospital for news of his arrival. and here we are getting ready to celebrate his 3rd birthday. hardly seems possible. this year, we are returning to the location of his 1st birthday party, (a local park) and the differences in how he is able to interact and play this time around are tremendous. we are always both celebrating and grieving his ever changing and constant development. in many ways, things are so much easier now, but as he grows and becomes more independent, he feels less like a baby and that i do not appreciate! i'm adding a couple of pictures to see how he has changed in the last 2 years. the first picture is caden on march 29, 2005, his exact 1 year birthday. the second picture was taken just a couple of weeks ago. there are not words to express fully just how much i love him and how lucky i feel to be his mommy.

Magic Monday

i sure missed my little monster this weekend so we decided that since mommy is on spring break, caden should at least get to stay home today as well. we have had fun but boy i am a tired cookie today! i woke him up at 7:30--yes you read that right, I woke him up, because i thought he was breathing kind of funny and whimpering so i needed to see if it stopped when he was awake. it did so then i of course tried to convince him to go back to sleep but he wasn't having anything to do with that!! so we have played, and watched a movie, and played some more! he is such a joy and he makes me laugh so much! so, we've stayed in our pj's and just been hanging out. he's not going to my parent's house tonight like usual because they had her appt with a osteoporosis specialist at ku med this afternoon. looking forward to what they have to say. she thinks she may have at least bruised, if not broken, a rib running into the counter downstairs so they really do need to get her started on some kind of regimen! tonight--nothing too exciting going on either. just hanging out with my husband and my baby, but tomorrow tammi asked me to go to topeka with her to pick out some spring/summer clothes so how can a girl turn that down??

St. Patrick's Day weekend

WHAT A GREAT WEEKEND!!! We had so much fun in Kansas City this weekend. Friday we arrived around 5pm at our hotel on the plaza and got things unloaded before going to dinner at the fabulous Figlio's. It's truly the best italinan food i have yet to find anywhere. there we 7 of us for dinner--my jess, nursing girls jessie, megan, ashley, justine, tammi, and i. then we were off to find a target and a liquor store. after some little bit of difficulty we located a target and got supplies. then, i stuffed 4 girls in my back seat and we were off!! we decided to stay in the hotel friday night and just hang out. meg and ash did go to the hotel hot tub and saw some disturbing should-have-been-private sexual activity there, so they came back to the room, after nearly being assaulted by 3 guys in the elevator! we laughed so hard all night long and called it a night about 3am i think. jess, tammi, and i slept in the king bed and justine, ashley, and megan shared the sofa bed. pretty comfortable night other than the early morning trash truck and then our sink dripping enough all night that it overflowed and was a bit surprising when you walked through the door way to hit the bathroom!! ashley took off at 9am and the rest of us got ready for the parade which we missed!! we didn't finish getting ready until noon and it started at 11 so we decided just to go eat and then go and shop. meg wanted us to go to the cheesecake factory and yes, the cheesecake is TO DIE FOR!! the food was great, company even better!! tammi headed back to emporia after lunch. the rest of us took off for our shopping day. tammi, however, got a little turned around and spent a hour or so just trying to get out of the plaza!!! i have done that too and it is SO frustrating!! she finally got different directions and went out by KU Med center where a girl was going psycho in the street and the rescue men were chasing her and eventually tackled her, but not before she came and ran into tammi's car while the traffic was stopped!! she said that she was sure it was the leprechaun's talking to her! we went to this new shopping district called "the legends". i had never been there and am really unfamiliar with this part of kc so it was a challenge finding our way there, and a much bigger challenge finding our way home!! the exit we needed was closed and you know detours are lots of fun anywhere, but they are especially helpful in DOWNTOWN kc!! WE WERE LOST FOR 2 HOURS!! i was so frustrated so by the time we got back to our hotel and we only had 2 hours for 4 girls (2 of which needed showers) to get ready for dinner and our night out! the hotel bar was absolutely packed with very loud and very drunk people and we could hear the same guy yelling even when we were in our room on the 11th floor!!! we decided to go to a restaurant megan called "baja 500" and my friend julie met us there. it's actually called "baja 600" but it will be forever 500 to me!! again, very good food. after several drinks we hailed a cab to take us to the beaumont club. of course, they block off many roads near the westport district for st. patrick's day so we couldn't get that close by car and 2 of my dear friends were wearing tube tops so they were a wee bit chilly!! we walked the 3 blocks to the club and initally, i was not pleased. it was playing only country music and it was extremely crowded and dirty but justine found us a fabulous place to people watch and we had a ball!! they played lots of different kinds of music and we laughed so hard watching these very drunken fools!! we never even went to the dance floor we just stayed up top watching!! they have an electric bull that you can ride too, but we steered clear of that for this trip. megan and justine managed to try to get into a couple of fights with men--but it all worked out in the end!! this one dumb guy had stepped right in front of megan and i on our way up the stairs and wouldn't move so justine decided that he deserved to have a tiny bit of beer spit on his head!! jess and i heard her talking about it, but soon, this fool who should not be allowed to drink was yelling at us, all of which we couldn't hear a word of...so he actually climbed up on a table to get closer to us...there were 2 guys on both sides of us watching and were ready to step in, anyway--jess and i were saying that no one spit on him when low and behold, justine did!!! i thought i was going to die laughing!! then he told me that me, justine, and megan were "hoes" so i simply said that my life would forever be changed by his view of us!! what a mess. jess and i kept a close eye on him though because we both felt that if he had the chance, he might not be done with justine who almost poured her beer on his head because he was going to spit in her face!! we also had a great time watching the "wedding guy" who clearly was not dancing with this wedding date, and this messed up fat girl who thought that she was very sexy whew.....alcohol does trick the brain!! we decided to head back to the hotel at 1:45am and as we were getting ready to walk out, this guy at the table behind us grabbed my arm and said "hey, my friend here thinks you are cute" to which i replied, "thank you. so does my husband" and i said goodbye to his friend. my favorite part of the weekend came next though...we flagged down a mini-van cab for the ride home. the other 3 were in the back and i was in the front as there was only 1 bench seat in the van since the other had been removed. so we start going and the cabby is on his phone with his friend talking in a language that we can't understand and he goes a few feet before he suddenly slams on his brakes and i feel this "bam" on the back of my seat as my darling and lovely megan is thrown from her seat and hits the back of mine!! i thought i was going to pee my pants!!! she didn't really get hurt but she immediately started saying (the entire way home) "sir, sir, my knee is really hurt. i'm serious, i think my knee is messed up, i may need to go to the hospital" and on and on and on!! during all of this, he put his phone down and forgot until i kindly reminded him that his friend was on the phone!! i really thought i might die and we practically carried megan into the hotel for effect. she said she was trying to get our ride free and was "taking one for the team"....we all barely made it to the lobby bathroom before wetting ourselves!! we stayed up until 3am again, finishing off the drinks in our room and doing fun things to megan when she went to sleep. we laughed so hard that today, our voices are all pretty iffy!! yes, we got many pictures!! some on meg's camera that will be a surprise to her when she develops her shots!! we got back to town about 3pm and i watched the kansas jayhawks kick some kentucky fanny and took a nap with my little boy!! i missed him so much!! jess was going home to sleep too and she's not yet taking my calls so i'm guessing she is out for the night!! it truly was so fun!! jess actually said that she hadn't had that much fun since before her mom had been diagnosed with cancer! i'm so glad she went and she really hit it off with my school friends. as i expected and predicted they loved her!! we all decided that we are definately going to do this again in the future!! embassy suites will never be the same!!

what a day!!

as you know, yesterday was our 1st clinical day at the VA in topeka. it sure was an early and long day!! left town at 5:45am and returned at 5:15pm. it was interesting. another student and i were placed in the "acute care" ward which means basically that people are admitted during their crisis and are stabilized here. they are then sent to another more long term mh facility or stabilized enough to return to their home environment, wherever that may be. as you can imagine in a military hospital, there are many people experiencing post-traummatic stress and depression, but we also talked with those detoxing from alcohol/drugs, obsessive compulsive, schizophrenic, and schizoaffective inflicted people. very interesting day. one of the 1st things that happened was that there is a patient that for some reason, just runs everywhere. kind of stooped over and shuffling-feet running. well, there is a whole ward meeting every morning where clients are able to request that their privileges be expanded etc. well, this pt was a few minutes late and came running in wearing only a shirt and depends diaper! they were quickly escorted to finish getting dressed. there was another individual who is experiencing extremely severe obsessive-compulsive disorder who gets stopped in mid stride and becomes so fixated on completing the rituals that alleviates the anxiety they feel, that they almost go into a catatonic type trance. this patient will stop in the middle of whatever they are doing and just be stuck until finally they take a few steps backward and start again. and they will answer appropriately whatever you ask them during this trance too! very interesting. most were very nice individuals. we sat in on a couple of "team meetings" where the patient, dr's, and social workers meet and discuss how things are going and what needs changed. we had the opportunity to witness an intake admission where the individual was not being truthful and was confronted on this behavior. how things changed then. there was no more talking and no more interview!! after lunch, we got to go to recreational therapy where we played 'sorry' and 'uno' with some patients. a pretty fun but long day for sure! my whole group and instructor were walking down a hallway when we ran into a couple of patients who shouted "oh my...look there they go wearing their cloaks of importance" which i thought was funny. another student said to me "they seemed nice" so i had to tell her that i didn't think that was a compliment!! how funny!! i'm pretty comfortable (at least so far) in this environment and in dealing with these people but for the most part my peers are not. they get very anxious and scared and some even had nightmares the night before. so, i think this rotation will do a lot for their understanding that the mentally ill are people and have feelings and needs just like everyone else. i am hoping that there will be less unhelpful fear and more understanding, and that they are able to distinguish the difference between when they really should listen to their own fear and instincts about personal safety, and that sometimes, it's not needed. so i got home a little after 5pm and hadn't been feeling very well all day so i laid down for a few minutes before joining chris and caden at the park across the street where they had been flying caden's kite and swinging. when caden saw me, i could hear him yelling "mommy" from clear across the park!! the sweetest sound! we went to dinner and the store and when we got home i crashed!! thank heavens for daddy!! i actually went to sleep around 9 i think!!
i had my interview with the boys and girls club this morning. she only had concerns about my schedule which is also my concern along with having too many responsibilities for a part time job. i would be responsible for the programming of the school along with hiring and firing of staff. this summer would be monday-friday 7:30-5:30 which is a little more than i wanted to work but it would be really fun i think. and she said that i could bring caden some days like friday's is swimming day so he could definately come then and wednesday they do "brown bag concert series" so he come then too. that would be nice. it would also help me with my dieting this summer!! i'd be taking my lunch everyday and be doing a lot of exercise playing with the kids!! and i'd probably be pretty darn tan from being outside so much!! so we'll see. she had 2 more interviews today and said she was hoping to make a decision by tomorrow so she'd call me either way! i like that quick turn-around!
looking very forward to my weekend!! we're leaving tomorrow around 3pm!! so, that's what i know!!

updates

had a great day yesterday. beautiful weather and blue, blue skies. we didn't officially have class, but we were required to attend a biofeedback session. kind of nice actually. i may do that again since i can't afford massages every week to ease away my stress! i also weighed in and lost another 2.5lbs. so that's about 5.5 so far. i can certainly live with that. i was very pleased actually because i ate like the devil last friday (all day) and then had 2 slices of pizza at macy's birthday party sat night. i'm not weighing in again until next friday.
i have an interview tomorrow morning with the boys and girls club. i'm very excited but the tiniest bit hesitant out of concern that they may be trying to put too much on the unit directors plate within the amount of time that i would be working. nothing new about that really. seems like that is true everywhere so we'll just have to see. i do hope it works out though (i think!!).
we're headed off to the VA in topeka in about 15 minutes for our first day of our clinical rotation. it'll be a long day but i'm looking forward to it. gotta run!! have a great day!

Relaxing weekend

another nice weekend for the books. friday afternoon we had the baby shower that started a bit behind schedule, and i spent some time with heather and jess that evening. saturday, i got to sleep in since chris and caden and papa tom had plans for the pancake feed but i refused to attend (thanks to my diet). chris got some fishing in before leaving for my niece macy's birthday party. it was bowling party and i think caden decided after 2 rolls that he didn't really want to bowl! so we hung out and had pizza and got home around 8pm or so. today was a quiet day and an EXCEPTIONAL KU Jayhawk basketball game! what fun to watch! and chris played in a basketball game this evening. caden and i went to watch with some of the other wives and kids and guess what??!! chris almost got into a fight with another player! i, of course am extremely helpful during the pushing of one another, by standing up on the bleachers yelling "chris, chris, chris" you know, trying to bring him back to reality and maybe a little of "your son is watching and learning", but i won't tell him that. so when the game was over, he came over and said that despite the fact that the score was 30-60 (our guys on the losing end) they were throwing elbows and he was just tired of the elbows! well, that's understandable but still!!! of course, it really stinks when every 3 min the opposing team has enough players to substitute out THE ENTIRE TEAM and our one and only sub left before the half rolled around!! it was a good time and a nice evening to get out of the house for just a short time and not have to spend any money! works out good!
tomorrow morning, i am applying for a job at the boys and girls club. it's part time, just a couple of days after school during the week and then it would move to 3-4 full days for the summer. just perfect i think. i'm hoping it works out!! so wish me luck!!
i'm looking very much forward to this weekend coming up. it's my "girls weekend" in kansas city. there are about 10 of us girls, some nursing students and some not, that rented a big suite on the plaza in kc for the weekend. it'll be a very fun time and i am so so happy that my jess is going too! it'll be great for us both to get out of town for the weekend!!

long time

sorry--it's been a while since i've posted. i don't even have any good excuses actually! just lazy i suppose. been a good week. i no longer have classes on tuesday and friday's so i'm starting the job hunt for something part time for now and summer. i was very excited to see a want ad for a "part time unit director" at the boys and girls club here in town! so i called and am picking up the application on monday morning!! she said that it is for a couple of days 3:30-6:30 from now until school is out and then 3-4 full days per week this summer. sounds perfect to me! we'll see if it works out.
had leslie's (from my old work) baby shower today at jess's house. it was nice but it was scheduled for 3pm and no one, I MEAN NO ONE, arrived until 3:30!! who does that?! jess and i were just amazed but we laughed a lot and had a fun time. mom got to come after physical therapy and it was nice for her to be able to see everyone since she's working in the basement now instead of with all the girls. i hung out with jess and heather tonight for a while and had a nice time.
on wednesday, we went and visited the VA hospital where we'll be doing our clinicals for the next 8 weeks. we didn't get to see any of the actual units, just how to get to the various places. it'll be a fun experience i think.
tomorrow chris and caden are meeting grandpa tom at the annual kiwani's pancake feed at 7 in the morning and then in the afternoon we get to go to my niece, macy's bowling party in eureka! i always love seeing my in-laws and caden sure liked bowling last weekend so it should be a fun time! that's about what i know for now!

A Nice Saturday

what a nice weekend i've had so far. friday night, i hung out at jess's house and worked on re-sizing the bracelets i had made for some of my family as christmas gifts so when i see them next weekend, they should be ready to go! we had a nice diet compliant dinner with a few alcoholic beverages and a ton of laughs! my mother in law arrived last night too and was still awake when i arrived home so we visited briefly before turning in for the night. i got to spend the morning and part of the afternoon with her. and her watch that i fixed several times last night (thanks jess for making that possible LOL ) fit just right! i'm sure it would have been too small if jess hadn't knocked it clear out of my hand and off the table just as i was finishing it and caused the beads to fly off and roll across the table so i had to start over!! it was a very good laugh though. she even peed herself a little! i love it when that happens! anyway--i sincerely mean it when i say that i love my mother in law. i'm not sure what it is exactly about her, but she just makes me feel peaceful. so i was sad to see her go.
we did go to one of caden's friend's 4th birthday party this afternoon. it was a bowling party and to my surprise, caden actually bowled! he loved it....he really loved the bowling shoes because they were a little bit slippery and he was being so silly!! he even got a strike (with daddy's help and a little help from the bumpers). then grandpa tom called and reminded me that we had dinner plans! so we met up with him at 6:30. poor tired caden fell asleep on the way out to his place and slept on grandpa's coat on the floor of the restaurant all the way through dinner. that bowling and partying is sure hard work on such a sweet little boy! grandpa tom wanted to have caden help him roll coins for fun, but he was too spent so we just came on home. fun for another day! chris and i rented a movie (the departed) that we are hoping to watch tonight also.
checked on miss jessie a little bit ago to see how the quitting smoking thing is going. other than she said she is eating everything in sight, she's ok! she said she doesn't think she'll gain too much weight back though because she can't afford to go back to the grocery store!! i told her that i thought she should go ahead and take today and tomorrow to eat what she finds helpful and then get back on the weight watchers wagon on monday. i promised to lend emotional support throughout the night and even tie her to her bed as restraints should it become necessary! i truly am the best friend!!! caden's watching curious george so chris and i are off to watch our movie!!

better

so, i've spent some time doing one of my favorite relaxing things...sitting in the dark and listening to music very loudly...lucky for chris and caden i figured out how to download some songs to my mp3 player!! i'm feeling much better and much more in control. i will do this and i will NEVER, hear me.....NEVER be this size again. i'm determined, motivated, and a little pissed that it has taken me this long to suck it up and get on it. after all, it's my own stupid fault that i'm here...it still makes me angry though that i can't be one of those tiny little things that never gains a freaking pound. but that's really not ever going to change so it's up to me! i'll be stronger when it's over....i'll grow stronger everyday along the way too. every day, every moment that i make good choices is really another battle won and that's bound to build you up! it's a strange feeling really, to at moments feel so strong and committed and at the same time to feel right on the edge...pushes in the right direction will take me far! i'm ready to live life as a small person again and forever (except of course when i'm pregnant again)! i'm very much enjoying working out and i intend to keep it up and add to my current plan actually. so, here we go on the upswing....this week might be heck to make it through but it will all be worth it when i go and weigh in on tuesday i know it!! and it'll be so worth it to feel good about my physical self again and to feel proud when i walk into a room rather than like hiding. so...that's it!!

hard times

so, i started my new diet. i feel like i'm going crazy even though i know that if i can just make it through this 1st week (and i will) then i'll be ok. i've done very well. i had a moment of panic, really panic, when i was trying to go to sleep last night and felt like i had to have something to eat. not to eat really as much as i needed a taste in my mouth and i didn't want to drink any pop so in my desperation i tried chris and caden's juice that i previously thought was pretty bad...funny how things can change so much so quickly when you are withholding so much. it did the trick actually and i was able to go to sleep without eating. i know it sounds crazy but anyone who has really experienced the issues i have and tried to get rid of the weight pretty drastically, knows what i am talking about. i am proud of myself....in 2 days i have only had 8 diet pops....that might sound like a lot to some of you but i was drinking probably 10 a day...that might be a little much but you get the picture. it's a HUGE switch. i also drank 7 bottles of water yesterday and 4 so far today. i don't drink water. unless i'm really working out or at water aerobics last night which was CRAZY!! it was a great workout. we had our italian dinner at school today but instead of putting myself in a position that i might have a lot of trouble controlling, i opted to come home and have my shake. i have felt very much on the verge of tears all day and a little nuts~! i'll get through it though. anyway-got homework to get done so i can call it a night.

catching up

i am so thankful for today.... no class and no clinicals. in fact we are done with the complex care portion of this semester's clinicals and will soon switch to mental health. for that we go to the VA hospital mental health ward in topeka. that means, we leave about 5:30am and get home about 6 or 7pm. long day but it's only 1 day per week and it sounds like it's really going to be a nice break. my friends come home with hilarious stories to tell and we don't pass medications or anything like that with the patients, we just talk with and play games with the patients. we also watch tons of movies it sounds like, so boring but it will be a nice break from the really quick thinking, fast moving pace of the ER. i will miss it terribly though. if i could just have a break for a few days, and get to go back to the ER, i'd love it!! my favorite er nurses were both working yesterday and so i told them that i knew they were going to really miss me and they both said "oh, you'll be back. no doubt, we will be working with you again". they are probably right. if i didn't have such a strong desire to do labor and delivery (and i do, it's overwhelming actually), i would definately be an er nurse. i just love the unpredictability and the pace. yesterday was interesting. we were waiting for an ambulance to arrive with a head trauma who was severely hypoglycemic and combative (probably due to having such a low blood sugar). so were were all waiting in the trauma room for them to roll in, and lise (nurse) said, "ok, if i were you all, i'd get those white lab coats off and gloves on now. we don't know how much blood there is going to be"...so that's when we really knew it was going to be something. it ended up that there was just a big cut that needed stitched, but the care that is taken to ensure that the patient remains safe and aligned to prevent any potential worsening of spinal cord injuries is pretty neat to watch. there was a lot of blood. i don't really mind that. we also had a 20 year old girl come in who was a screamer!! she is apparently a drug addict (according to her family physician) who wouldn't allow us to give her any narcotic pain medication. she said her hip was hurting her. so she laid in the room screaming and crying for "someone to please help her" sad really and i wondered why mental health wasn't called but we did give her 3 IM pain injections and she still left screaming and angry with the er staff. she wasn't my patient but i got to hear her anyway!! then, i had a 3 1/2 year old little boy (i always race to the little ones) and he was truly the best patient! he likes going to the dr so he was so cooperative (of course i was also playing with him and gave him stickers)!! he did manage to puke all over but i happened to be out of the room when it happened so i was clean!! he had a respiratory virus and needed a breathing treatment, that combined with the steroid we gave him, made the little guy sick. poor thing, but really such a good boy!! i'll miss all this er craziness!!

we have managed to lose 3 students in my class this semester so far. all 3 were in the OB/Pediatrics rotation so that's a pretty small group these days. i'll be in that rotation during the fall semester of my senior year next august. kind of scares me!! we know for certain that 1 and likely 2 actually, were officially kicked out of the program, and the 3rd was a little more voluntary i guess. kind of crazy~!

on a "so proud of her note" my jess stops smoking on saturday!!! she has been taking a medication that has allowed her cut down for the last couple of weeks, and sat is actually stop day!! it's important for her health, and MINE!! heaven knows i don't want to get on an 18 hour flight to greece if she is still smoking!! no way!! i've seen what happens when things get stressful and she really wants to smoke!! things like, as soon as she gets outside and the lighter won't work, it gets chucked across the parking lot and tears begin to flow!! very funny in retrospect but not so much right then!! i have been seeing jess everyday this week and i LOVE IT!! i miss that girl when our schedules conflict. i spent time with her sat, and we have been at water aerobics together mon, tues, and tonight for sure!! then friday night were working on bracelets so i'll see her then too!! YEA!!

i start my diet today...i'm very excited actually but my family is already like, "lets go out to eat sat night, and let's go out to brunch next sunday" ( i think we're actually going to be in sedan--hope you don't care theresa!! that weekend) so i said, go ahead, i can't eat it anyway so don't re-schedule for us! i actually am required to have 1 real meal per day so i could eat it then, but i'm very serious about maintaining this and don't want distractions that i can easily avoid. so...i guess i'll have to be unsociable for a while!!

boy howdy--our march weekends have filled up quickly! this weekend we have a birthday party of one of the day care kids, next weekend my niece's birthday party and trip to visit chris's parents, the weekend of the 17th, i'll be out of town with my nursing friends, and then march 31st is caden's birthday party!! so, a busy month ahead!! that's it for now!!

nice weekend

it's been a nice weekend. friday, caden and i went over to my parents house and gave my mom a perm. caden was very helpful with the process, handing me rollers, papers, picks, and laughing at grammie when we put the foam on her head! it was a very nice evening. today, chris let me sleep late-very late actually, and then caden and i went to jess's house to celebrate heather's birthday with them and all the aunts. jess's dad left this morning only to be replaced with the aunts. it was very fun and caden had a great time. he was very shy initally as usual, but soon warmed right up and was playing and talking to just about everyone. the aunts even said how much more talkative he was this time versus the last time that they saw him. heather got some nice presents and got a beautiful music box and bracelet from her mom which was an emotional and very special moment. much laughter along with a few tears made for a very nice afternoon.
i do have some exciting news though...i went and visited with a place friday that is called "life balance health and wellness" here in emporia which specializes in weight loss and management. the program is very similar to one that i participated in for a while in topeka, and is expensive but less so than going to topeka every week. so after discussing it with chris and figuring out the financial piece we've decided to go for it! the exercise is going great and has been, but i need something more. and weight watchers here just doesn't seem to do it for me. plus, to keep motivated i need to see some significant results early on and with the other program that i did before getting pregnant with caden, i dropped 40 pounds pretty darn quick. this program here uses many of the same foods which i thought were generally pretty good, definately do-able, and i have 1 year to get the weight off before we go back to iowa for in vitro again. i have a lot to lose so i'm getting very serious!! it's very exciting to me! so that's what i know for now. off to bed...

Another Good Day

another good day here in lovely emporia, ks. clinicals went well, nothing too exciting in the ER, except one time when i thought we were going to get to go and work a code in same day surgery, but it got cancelled about the time all of our running feet arrived. great news for the patient! then i picked up my little ball of sunshine for our lunch date. we had lots of fun at then met with the speech lady/evaluator/tester for 1 1/2 hours. she agreed that caden was no longer in need of their services as he has met all the 36 months goals and surpassed many of them for the older children!! YEA CADEN! we already knew that though--he's come so far since last march when he got the tubes in his ears! he'll be 3 march 29th so i'm trying to think of a good birthday party for him. the little train isn't going to be ready again this year so we thought about doing some tractor rides at grandpa tom's but that's not going to work out either. he is insistent on having a "thomas the train" theme, but i'm not sure what else to do!! if you guys have ANY ideas i'd really love to hear them! I'M GETTING DESPERATE!! we don't need it to be a big thing, but need to have some activities for the children! so any help would be appreciated! well, nothing else is going on here really so just a pretty relaxing and fun day!!

busy day

well, for the 1st time this semester, i played hookie!! i just felt like taking a day and getting some things done around the house. so, i was a very busy lady...even cleaned my dressing room, which to those of you who know me personally, is a VERY BIG DEAL!! it's nice and clean...not spotless but enough to make my husband fall to his knees! i also did 3 loads of laundry this morning (which is something that chris usually does), and took out the trash, washed the jeep, went dining room chair shopping, and met with the speech therapy people! then tonight we made a quick trip to the store, and then i cooked supper, well the mashed potatoes, gravy, and peas anyway, while chris and caden went on a long walk! chris was so impressed! he even told me that he knew he'd make a "wife" out of me one day, it just took him quite a while and a trip to kansas city for the weekend! of course, he would never seriously make such a stupid remark, so it was pretty funny. and it's final...we found some chairs and ordered them this afternoon. shipping was free so it wasn't too bad a deal. looking forward to having safe seating at our table again!! so tomorrow i'm working in the ER again (yea!) and picking up my baby boy at noon for lunch and a meeting to finish up paperwork with the speech therapy folks. talked with the therapist this morning about stopping services since caden has made such progress and is talking up a storm these days. he simply couldn't hear us before he got the tubes in his ears and now that he can, he is a little jabber-jaw! i mean it, he almost talks non-stop! she was very impressed with his progress and "commended" me for working with him and always including him in conversation which is obvious when he says things like "mama izzie is hollering ". she says he has a great vocabulary and that i should be very proud....of course i am very proud of him, but she said i should be proud of me too! and i am proud of the parents that chris and i are. oh, we make many mistakes and we always will, but we do the best we can and we couldn't love our baby more! so, that's a wrap, now it's time to settle in and watch the jayhawks kick some wildcat butt!!

Fun Times

Chris and I returned from our much needed weekend get-a-way both a bit relaxed and a bit frustrated!! no, it's not what you think!! we had a great weekend, first going to the nelson-atkins museum of art. we have different tastes we discovered! and i'm also a bit impatient or maybe he's just a bit slow!!?? i don't know but we've decided that winter is not the time for me to visit because when it's warm, i could go outside and appreciate the beautiful architecture of the museum as well as the garden of sculptures, instead i was stuck inside and spent much of the day sitting on the bench waiting for my wonderful art-appreciating husband and thinking about all the horror movies, murder mysteries, and even scoobie doo episodes that take place in museums at night!! i said i'm not patient. i'm not sure that's the word really but i just want to walk into the room, and if something catches my eye, then i want to go over and read more about it. chris, well, he wants to read just about all of them regardless. i've decided that it's not really my fault. you see, in all my other duties, it's rush rush rush. rush to get the patient's medicine, rush to get the dr's orders, rush to get my homework done so i can hang out with my boys...rush rush rush. so, it's difficult for me to slow down it seems, unless i'm doing something with our caden baby! but in the end, we both agreed that it would be a beautiful place to renew our wedding vows in the future! plus, chris only got in trouble one time so that was good!!
then we went to the hotel chris found for us. it was the hotel savoy, apparently a very swank place in it's day and an um, "charming" place now. it is very old, and has the radiator-type heaters that hiss all night long and prompted me to immediately locate our escape route in the case of fire but it was nice and clean! they did have a lovely breakfast that you order for the next morning and at whatever time you specify, they have it ready for you in the dining room! great food. and the waiter said that he thought i looked like his sister he hasn't seen in about 10 years so he sent some cinnamon rolls and fresh fruit with us for the drive home! nice nice!
the dinner at figlio's on the plaza was AMAZING!! i mean it truly! not to mention that it is also where chris proposed to me so it has special memories for us. the comedy club was great!! i laughed so hard, i'm sure in part due to te 3 beers i consumed but i love it! the MC was ok funny, the opener was freaking HILARIOUS, and the headliner was average. i could've listened to the opener all night! it was great and we'll definately return.
then the frustrating part started. it was shopping day today for me but one of the most important items we were searching for was new dining room chairs. we have these chairs that i picked up at a yard sale probably 5 years ago which were extremely old but very cool so we re-finished them and have been using them for all this time. well, they are all pretty much broken and falling apart--literally. so it's time. we looked everywhere!!!!!!!! we finally found some for $50 a piece at nebraska furniture part which is an ok price, but they were out of stock so they'd have to deliver them later this week, with a $55 delivery fee. we weren't going for that! we visited nebraska furniture mart when we were crib shopping for caden and were treated terribly when we said that we did not want to spend $500 on a crib. i'm not exaggerating...$500 was the average. CRAZY!! so not a great start, but i've heard many many good stories since then so with no luck anywhere else, we decided to try it. let's just say we're not fans!! we just don't agree that we should have to pay the extra delivery fee when we were more than willing to transport them ourselves, had they been in stock...so no more nebraska furniture mart for us!
we sure missed our baby boy!! he had a great time and my parent's house and then papa tom's today. he sure was happy to see his mama and daddy though!! well, it's bath time for my precious boy so that's it for now!! hope you had a great weekend!

catching up

sorry it's been a few days. seems like during the week, i don't get much time to sit down and type! it's been a great week in the ER for clinicals! i am just very comfortable there and enjoy the staff very much. i like the unpredictability of the patients needing care and the opportunities to learn! nothing too serious came in so nothing too scary but enough to keep us busy most of the time. i expected many more falls and car wrecks but we lucked out this round of crappy weather.
today is passport day!!! it really does make the greece trip official i think! i still have a hard time believing the trip is real and we're really going to GREECE!! i'm so excited!! but for now, i'm very much looking forward to this weekend! chris and i are headed out of town sat morning and have lots of fun stuff planned just for the two of us! i still don't know where we're staying though. makes me a little nervous!!
caden and daddy both got their hair cut last night. it's so darn cute to see caden just sit there like such a big boy! i asked him if mama should get a hair cut too since he and daddy were and he said "yes" and i said " no silly, mama just got hers cut", he actually said "looks pretty mama". that kid is so dang cute! and we have some sort of BIG news to report...wednesday night when i was at water aerobics, chris came upstairs and found caden in the hallway with both his pants and his diaper down and he said he needed to go potty!!! of course, he had already gone so no luck but a BIG step in the right direction i think!!! yea!!

So far

so far, i've had a pretty nice weekend. really nice actually. last night my parents wanted caden so i had a date with my husband. we went to dinner and saw "hannibal rising" which did not live up to my expectations in case you wondered. we don't usually go to movies though so it was nice.
this morning, chris, caden, jess, and i headed out to the mall for some fun. they were having all kinds of activities...well, more like a health fair but the reason i really wanted to go was to get caden's pictures taken at "yesteryears photography". yes, it's one of those old time looking pics that you get to dress up and pretend and i really didn't think caden would go for it, but he LOVED it! he decided to be a "hunter boy" and even wore a coon skin hat! i couldn't believe it! they are adorable and we actually get to pick them up on monday! when it was done, which was like all of 10 minutes because caden is so used to having a camera in his face that he is pretty darn cooperative, he said "fun time mama"! they are coming back march 31 so i think we might borrow kaylee and have some done of her too. way cute! and of course chris, caden, and i played like crazy tonight. man, i love that kid. nothing makes me happier or more at peace than just being in his presence. such a miracle.
tomorrow, i have have have to study for a test in critical care that's on monday, but i'm definately going to make time to create some fun valentines with caden. he picked madagascar for daycare but we're going to make some homemade ones too. i love to do stuff like that with him.
i'm very excited about this week at school too. both clinical days i am in the ER where i like to be and am used to how things run. i love the unpredictability of it and the staff is great! so that will make for a good week i hope, especially in contrast to last week! then next saturday, my wonderful husband and i are heading out to kansas city to go to a comedy club show and spending the night in a hotel. it'll be very nice to get out of town. i gave chris the responsibility of booking our hotel and now he won't tell me where we are staying!! he says it's a surprise! we're doing this to celebrate both valentine's day and my 30th birthday that was in december. times are too crazy then and money to short to do anything so we postponed to this weekend! that's about all i know so far!

Frustrated

I can't even begin to explain how frustrated i have been with myself today. this was my long clinical day. i was to meet my patient, do pre-op stuff with her, take her to surgery, scrub in on her surgery, go with her to the recovery room, and then take care of her post-op up on the medical floor. so, met her--she was nice, family was nice, no problem. went to surgery--GREAT. put in her catheter no problem, the dr was great and we joked around a lot, nurses good, and my patient did very well. recovery room was fine. spent a lot of time talking with the anesthesiologist and then accompanied my patient back to her room. well, apparently i left my brain in the OR. or maybe the anesthesiologist just has some anesthesia on him all the time that i unknowingly inhaled...i don't know but seriously....i was a freaking mess. could not get organized. she had a nasogastric tube and an incisional drain placed during surgery, both of which were new to work with for me, had iv antiobiotics that needed hung right away, vital signs every 15 min, then 30 min, then hourly, needed a new iv because hers was too old and was leaking (which thankfully i found...my one success today). i got her IV in right away, but immediately it blew. so much stuff and i just never felt like i knew at all what i was doing, couldn't find anything on the floor....blah blah blah...my instructor was extremely patient with me, but i was so embarrassed. i just wanted to go back to the ER!! extremely disappointed in myself today. although, i am aware, that this is the first time i've been back on the hospital floor since last semester, and i should expect some disorientation initially, but it was freaking ridiculous. now, my patient was comfortable and cared for appropriately and i know that if i was going back to care for her tomorrow, it'd be a completely different story. i'd be fine. her pain was managed, her family was involved, and we communicated very well. it was all the other "technical" stuff that got me today. it all got done but to say the least, it WAS NOT PRETTY!!
then i also got a message that my hair dresser's poor baby is sick today so no haircut and highlight for me tonight!! ughhhh.....i could have used some beauty time! perhaps a hot bath, or maybe a beer or two will do...tomorrow's a new day...

lazy weekend

what i had hoped to be a lazy weekend, turned out to be a little less. had a very long dinner with my parents on friday night (terrible service), and then my mom had another set back that took us to the emergency dept on saturday for several hours. where she was dealing with her right hand that didn't seem to work, her left hand has now followed suit. we've got to be missing something....just can't seem to get it figured out. any ideas? had our monthly brunch with our extended family and that was quite fun actually! much more so than normal as a matter of fact! the rest of our day we spent working on remodeling our basement and basement bathroom. and of course watching the superbowl! YEA COLTS!! haven't talked much to my jess though and i'm feeling a little withdrawl! i try to give her a bit more space when heather is in town. hope she is feeling better! so, no homework done yet but i'm not feeling too well so i'm headed to my comfy bed!! hope you had a great weekend!

a very long day

1/2 day tuesday (6:30am-1200) and wednesday (6:30am-4pm) are my clinical days for school. yesterday i worked at the cancer center, this morning i was in dialysis, and this afternoon i spent in wound care. let's just say, wound care...not my thing. i have NO desire to pick and scrape people's incredibly deep wounds. until nursing school, i had no idea that wounds could go so deep. anyway, it's not my thing. and by the end of wednesday, my feet HURT!! not bad when i'm moving around a lot, like on the floor, but this standing in 1 place watching like in the OR and today, not such a good deal. i have 2 out of 3 tests tomorrow, so in general not a great week at school.

yesterday afternoon was GREAT however!! jess and i went and met with her Adoption and Beyond social worker for the home study! it's official!! i am so excited for her to be a mom! and of course we did some shopping afterward!

then my husband told me that the big big boss who used to be the plant manager at emporia's plant, called and told him to talk to me and see what it would take for us to relocate to the plant in plattesburg, NY. NY!! no freaking way! i'd love to visit new york, really want to go some day but NYC is a long way from plattesburg and a much longer way from our families! chris doesn't think he wants to go either but we are interested in finding out what's offered. we've already turned this offer down once. we'll do it again i have no doubt. my son and my future children need our families and we already don't see chris's family enough. we'd never see them and that i can't stand. not to mention my parents and of course miss jessie and her soon-to-be new baby. no amount of money could replace any of that. a great compliment for chris though. i'm proud of him. anyway--he can caden will be home soon so i better be get ready!

Our little boy

this is our Caden Montgomery. the love of our lives!!

What a day...

My mom went to the dr in overland park, ks today. she actually got good news. to catch you up, she fell at work in july. fractured her pelvis in 3 places which was not diagnosed until almost 6 weeks into it, also broke her nose in 2 places, and hurt her shoulder. Yes, it was a nasty fall. then on the saturday before thanksgiving, she woke up and suddenly couldn't use her right (dominant) hand. she calls it her "trick hand" or her flopping fish. it still is not better. she's got a couple other things going on but that's enough for now. anyway, she saw a dr that her atty set up for her. he did a bunch of testing and told her that she has 2 new fractures on her left side which is why that side is really hurting her. he said she has osteoporosis so to get started on some meds to combat that and get to water aerobics. so, at least we know the source of her pain and that it should get better. and he also told her that he thought her hand function would come back, but that if it did not, they could perform a surgery to correct it and she would regain function. so that's great news in my book. osteoporosis is manageable and she'll get her hand back one way or another. and he told her that she has a great attorney. i'm pleased. of course i wish she was back to her old self but it's still going to take some time. i just hope she feels more hopeful and her spirits get better. she's only in her early 50's and a young one at that so this has really, really set her back.
then i got another phone call, my dad, tom, (he and my mom were married until i was in kindergarten). he called to say that his mom died today. they have not had a close relationship. so many things unresolved. it hurts my heart that he never felt her acceptance or her love. she lived in arkansas. not yet sure when the service will be.
on a lighter note, we had a pretty good snow a couple of weeks ago and we made snowmen with my son last weekend. well as it does, the snow is melting and caden was very upset today that his snowman didn't have a head anymore. he insisted that his daddy make a new one so chris did. the little things we do for our children. and speaking of children...tomorrow is a big day for my jess! we are going to overland park to meet with the adoption agency for the first time!! YEA!! can't wait until we get to start having baby showers and she finally gets to bring her little miracle child home!! until tomorrow....

It's official!!

Well, she did it. My best friend, Jessie, finally managed to get me to blog!! Many of you may know her from her blog "Hunna's Happenings". She's great! So after months and months of gentle pushes, she won! So i guess I should introduce myself. My name is Darby, (clearly), and I am currently working toward becoming an RN (BSN). I have only 3 semesters left!! Prior to starting nursing school, I got a master's degree in social work and worked for 6 years in the one of a kind world of Child Welfare. I truly mean that. It is one of a kind and any of you who work in it know exactly what I mean. I am a mother-- My greatest accomplishment and biggest goal. My son, Caden, will be 3 years old at the end of March. Time goes so fast! I am so in love with him and would be happy at the end of my life just knowing that I had been a good mom to him. He is my world. My husband too! We'll be married for 6 years this August. We've been together though for almost 13 years! He is amazing! Unfortunately, (and i mean that sincerely), my in-laws live almost 2 hours away. Close for some, but I really love them and wish that we had the chance to be with them more often. My parents (all of them) live here in town and keep me very busy! My mom is struggling with many health issues right now so while there is a great deal of stress involved with that, I'm thankful for the opportunity to have her so close. I have several other family members close by here as well, and like most others, don't get to see them often enough. Jessie has been my best friend for almost 3 years now. We met when i was on maternity leave from work. She and I worked as a team doing foster care social work, and became best friends quickly. She inspires me, challenges me, and teaches me so much. In our friendship, we have had many adventures. A trip to Vegas to visit her dad, the journey of her mother's illness and death from pancreatic cancer, adjusting to spending so much time together at work and then my decision to quit work to attend nursing school, my mother's illnesses, my sister's drama (we won't get into that today), and thankfully a much needed trip of a lifetime to Greece at the end of May! Jess has also just begun the process of adopting a child from Ethiopia!! I said earlier, my husband is amazing. I meant it whole-heartedly! He supports me (and Jess) in everything we decide to do and never questioned the times that she needed me through her mom's illness. And what a great husband to let his wife go on all these great trips with her best friend! He loves her too. His respect for her is immense. I'm thankful and lucky to have my best girlfriend and my husband get along so well! I'm extremely lucky to be surrounded with such supportive and loving people! It's not all a bed of roses though....you'll have to re-visit to hear more...