hard times

so, i started my new diet. i feel like i'm going crazy even though i know that if i can just make it through this 1st week (and i will) then i'll be ok. i've done very well. i had a moment of panic, really panic, when i was trying to go to sleep last night and felt like i had to have something to eat. not to eat really as much as i needed a taste in my mouth and i didn't want to drink any pop so in my desperation i tried chris and caden's juice that i previously thought was pretty bad...funny how things can change so much so quickly when you are withholding so much. it did the trick actually and i was able to go to sleep without eating. i know it sounds crazy but anyone who has really experienced the issues i have and tried to get rid of the weight pretty drastically, knows what i am talking about. i am proud of myself....in 2 days i have only had 8 diet pops....that might sound like a lot to some of you but i was drinking probably 10 a day...that might be a little much but you get the picture. it's a HUGE switch. i also drank 7 bottles of water yesterday and 4 so far today. i don't drink water. unless i'm really working out or at water aerobics last night which was CRAZY!! it was a great workout. we had our italian dinner at school today but instead of putting myself in a position that i might have a lot of trouble controlling, i opted to come home and have my shake. i have felt very much on the verge of tears all day and a little nuts~! i'll get through it though. anyway-got homework to get done so i can call it a night.